As mother's day approached this year, I kept feeling like I needed to do something extra special for you. I thought of all these things I could make for you, and I thought "This will be the year where I actually send a real, tangible card which you can open up and all, and a package too!" Procrastination, my pal, you got the best of me again. There is no card on it's way, nor package. But know that I intended one to be. Maybe a few months down the line, it will actually show up!
These past few months have been especially sentimental for me, and I have found myself thinking of you often. (Can you tell by the million phones calls each week?!) I am just so grateful for you in my life. You are such a strong woman! I hope you know that. I am now realizing that your independence, confidence, and ability to get what you want (about which we often tease you and chalk up to manipulation or swindling) are the most wonderful qualities. Why can't we respect women for their indepence? Why do we mask it as manipulation? Why do we turn it into a negative- or at best, a joke?
I think it's because this quality is so rare these days. We, as a society, have trained it out of women. We've taught women to be submissive and subordinate, and when they don't fit this mold, we are are taken aback and make judgements because we don't know what else to do. That's what I think.
You have taught me some of the most valuable life lessons. Lessons which no one else was able or brave enough to teach- not other women, not men, not school, not religion. Though it was hard for me to understand before, I know why you placed so much importance on self-love and self-care as a mother. I know why you advised me to prioritize my own interests; to keep working; to keep living my own life when I become a mother. I get it now.
So mom, please forgive me for the times I have not respected you, for the times I have made you to feel inadequate or unimportant, and know that that was just me trying to make sense of a woman who didn't fit the mold. Who couldn't fit the mold because her greatness could never be contained in that tiny box. Do you see how special that is? Can you feel your greatness? I hope so. And I hope to be more like that in my own life.
Gosh you are the greatest, and I love you so so much!